Esok nak BBQ?

mood: contemplative
music: Rainbow Connection

Work was fantastic today! My life has been wonderful to be among cheerful people. I have to say that I feel somewhat fulfilled today. I had some nice chat with my fellow co-workers and some of my American friends are becoming more and more comfortable being with me. Sometimes it feel so nice to have people to be very concern about you being around. I heard this one guy (and also some girls) were really concerned about my well being. hahahahahaha... First encounter like that could never put my smile away for a long long time.

So, what's new? Oh yeah, did my laundry today. God knows how long it has been *hihihihi*. Now I can put on every clothes that I own. By the way, apa nak pakai esok ek? hahahahaha... No brainer, pakai je la apa-apa yang baru basuh tu la kan. Apa lagi....

I can't say that I don't like this person that I have been talking to "lately". It is somewhat uncomfortable talking to this person. Yeah, how can you be comfortable talking to the person that you don't think can be your good friend la kan. You can be uncomfortable when it is your first time talking to her/him, if you mengumpat tak ingat dunia about her/him, if you are simply shy, or maybe if you are attracted to this one person. Macam-macam assumption boleh buat. But anyways, I have a good feeling about this one heck of a person. Takde la apa-apa pun. I don't even know this person personally. Cakap pun beberapa patah je. Tapi dah lama kenal la kan. Just we are not "good" friends, although sometimes I hear some gossips, cerita, and the things revolve around this person's life. But hahahaha... I can't even imagine if I were to be-friend this person while I just can't stop being not-so-comfortable when we are face to face. huh... My life is going to be so boring... (but yet so wonderful, how can it be???)

After thinking about it, I do think that the life-style and the idealism behind Amerinanism has been sucking the pure brains of the people all around the world. Even a person such as me has become more and more American (in character and mind) than a Malaysian. What can I say? Is this the thing that people say the American dream? The part where non-American wants to be an American? The section where people feel belonging in this part of vast land and opportunities? I have to say that I feel much more fulfulling here than living in the hardship life in Malaysia. I would think that I can never be satisfied working my ass off in an office somewhere in Kuala Lumpur. I would rather live here and live the American dream where I can be much more better off than keeping the same lifestyle of the same old Malaysian life. Whichever it is, I can see that even people in Malaysia are becoming more "polluted" in their mind and soul. Just look at the political scene where cronism is a never ending story. Politician blaming each other to be full ahead in power. Gila! Even if I want to be away from the political arena, I can't just stand there and pretend that everything is ok. My mind will go crazy! And today, just look at the young generation especially the malay youngsters who has started learning how to drink and have sexual intercourse freely... What kind of people are we cultivating now? These young people are the same people who I grow up with, the same education, the same generation... maybe a couple of years older or younger than me... But what has changed? Who let these young generation to just go ahead and do the things that they think is right? Don't they ever thought about religion? About being responsible to Allah and live life as the Prophet Muhammad has showed us? I know... I know... I am not the best person to be replicate upon. But to do things that are completely out of the path to heaven is totally not the answer. People should know what haram things to do and to be avoid of. What did they learned from kelas Agama Islam in school? What did they take from that? Nothing???

My mind is totally out of control right now... This is kinda serious matter to comprehend. I totally have many more things to write about this topic. But just let it at a rest for now. Maybe if I even have the words to blur onto paper or this journal, I'll write it again. Totally going to. But until next time, I love you all, And to all, a very good night.